It’s hard to believe that Cracked LCD is going on two years old. But here it is 2009 and next month will mark the anniversary of the first column. I’ve been thinking about some new recurring features and concepts for year three and one of them that I wish that I had thought of sooner is Michael’s Magical Mailbag. Yes, Cracked LCD does get a couple of fan letters, pieces of hate mail, and debt collection notices from time to time that Lord Abner hands off to me and usually I respond directly to the person or just throw it in the ol’ recycle bin, never to be seen again. I’ve gotten a couple of messages from old friends, Atlanta Game Factory alumni, and former customers and those are always nice to see.
So, to kick off the Magical Mailbag, we’ve got a great one from a reader who believes that I must be an “unpleasant man”. Apparently my positive
review of AGRICOLA
rubbed his sage the wrong way. Take it away, Jeremy!
Michael, please explain to me why you insult eurogames so much but continue to buy and review them – do I detect a hint of American arrogance in your comment: "“it really isn’t anything special and its competitive differentiators over other Eurogames like CAYLUS and PUERTO RICO are, ironically, exactly the kinds of things Ameritrash gamers and CCG players have been enjoying for years- variety, theme/mechanic integration, concrete decision making results, and satisfying replayability.”
As if Americans have had it right all along and Europeans with their wooden blocks are so stupid. What games do you think were big in the US that weren’t a success in Europe? Or what other genre of game are you imagining is so much better? (and why aren’t you playing it?)
Also why are you so rude about a game when you conclude that you like it and why are you taking the time to review it if you a.) don’t like the genre and b.) don’t feel particularly strongly about it either way. Finally why are you so grumpy and negative throughout – do you think people want to read such boring negativity? Listen to this:"they bring to the game a looseness and a sense of life that elevates the game above the usual mathematical masturbation exercises and efficiency planning that characterizes the genre (Eurogames)”
Why are you writing about Eurogames then? All the way through you just insult them so who is your audience then? Do you think people who dont like Eurogames are gonna read a review of one? If you hate them then do something else? I thought your review was terrible and it made you seem like a very unpleasant man and just to be clear I have never played Agricola, I am not trying to defend it, I was just so irritated by your review that I had to email you and ask why you wrote it? -- Jeremy
Well, why the hell wouldn’t I? I love a good Eurogame, and I gave a few Eurogames over the past couple of years some very positive reviews. I’ll play any game at least once, regardless of its regional origin, and there are plenty of times when I’d rather play a halfway decent Eurogame than a mediocre or terrible American one. There are plenty of fantastic games in the genre (AGRICOLA being one of them) and as an evaluator of board games I think it is important that I provide the readers of Cracked LCD with a broad range of possibilities. You must remember that the audience here at Gameshark.com is often not the usual folks you find at other boardgaming sites. I think it’s very important to demonstrate that there is a lot of variety in the hobby.
And Eurogames represent part of that variety. As do Ameritrash games. Obviously, I prefer Ameritrash games and I’d be willing to lay odds that most of the audience of Gameshark.com does too. I’d double the bet that most people outside of the hobby would be much more interested in a game featuring plastic spaceships and barbarians than one filled to bursting with brown wooden cubes.
Further, I place a high premium on writing honest, from-the-heart reviews and commentary about games. If I play a game I don’t like, then I’m not going to hold back. Even if it means being “rude” about a game, as you put it. Regular readers of this column likely have a pretty good handle on my likes and dislikes by now, and I think I’ve still managed to surprise them when a game doesn’t meet- or exceeds- my expectations and prejudices. If I were to write solely about games I liked, this would be a very boring column.
As to your comment that no one wants to read negative criticism- that may be true in the Pollyanna world of online, Euro-centric boardgaming discourse, but in the real world I think you’re very, very wrong. Negative criticism is one of the most useful tools that both those working in the game publishing industry and consumers can use to make smart purchasing decisions. It’s also the foundation for many interesting discussions and debates in the right forums, and many times an insightful negative review or comment can actually help someone realize why they like something or inspire them to think more critically about a game. These are good things that couldn’t happen if myself- and other board game writers- solely wrote about the games we liked or things we had positive opinions about.
Above all, outside of genre issues or grumpiness, I try to write about the subjects and titles that I cover here at Cracked LCD with a distinct, identifiable viewpoint. If you ever walk away from a Cracked LCD column unsure what I really thought about something, then I have failed. When you read through my AGRICOLA review, you are reading an appraisal of the game’s merits and deficiencies from my perspective. Not what the online cognoscenti are saying, and not what popular opinion dictates. And yes, I do think there are attributes of both the “classical” and modern American design idioms that are vastly superior to what has been going on for the past decade in Europe. My review- and bias- speaks directly to that viewpoint as I try to frame the game with these prejudices in mind.
The bottom line is that Cracked LCD is an opinion column and I encourage you to have your own opinion about what I write as well as what I write about. I do not objectively report the news. I do not soft-peddle mediocre reviews solely to foster good will and reassure readers of the false belief that all games are somehow good and have merit, because in fact many of them- such as the American game TOMB- are absolute disgraces and embarrassments to the hobby. You’re dead on about one thing at least: I am a very, very unpleasant man.
OK, next up it’s a blast from the past. Remember that
SURVIVE edition
of Games from the Crypt? I don’t either. But this guy does.
Hi -- This sound great - how do we get some company to re-publish (or whatever the correct word would be) the game? Lots of "retro" things out there are successful, seems like someone should have the vision. Any ideas? Thanks - Mike
It is a great game, Mike, and I think you should buy it. I think everybody should buy it. I would buy it again if it were republished. But it isn’t very likely as the rights are probably either tied up at Parker Brothers, Waddingtons, or possibly in the hands of the designer who I’ve never been able to identify. There is a chance that it could actually be in public domain and no one has pursued it.
It’s funny because I do run into a lot of people in the 30-40 year age bracket that have fond memories of SURVIVE even if they’re not board gamers. So it could have some retro cache even in the mainstream market. And it’s a great, accessible game that anyone can enjoy- it’s not filled with a bunch of nerd crap and esoteric jargon like so many hobby games.
As for getting it reprinted, you could always start one of those awful internet petitions- you know the ones, where a serious effort to start a grassroots movement is derailed by the guy that posts “dood I ‘luv survive plz reprint now”. Or you could give Valley Games a call; they’re big in the reprint business. By the time they get it to market, your unborn children will be old enough to play it even though the sea serpent pieces all arrived broken and they put a DIE MACHER board in the box.
You’d be better off hitting eBay, but prices can trend pretty high for it. Make sure to look for its English edition, ESCAPE FROM ATLANTIS as well. SURVIVE also turns up every now and then in thrift stores.
Oh no, this next guy is a lawyer. Didn’t he read There Will Be Games? I bet he’s trying to swindle me, lock me up, or both. Whatever the case may be, your honor, he’s reaching even further back, all the way to
Cracked LCD 1.8
-- my review of Armageddon Empires.
